A Joke

You are a joke
I wonder if you're on coke

You do your thing
And you like to sing

Like being in the center of attraction
You search for others affection

You think you got the flow
But don't you know?
You made more foe

I'm having a hard time
It's funny when I rhyme
Now that I heard the clock's chime
It's STUDY time




p/s: i thought of a funny poem tonight. rhyming just isn't my thing, but this just for fun. so it doesn't really matter if my rhyming is odd

My Heart

My Heart fluttered when I saw you over there
You looked pale from the cold
Your face was as white as the snow
Still,
I like it that way

My Heart raced when you walked towards me
Afraid you’ll catch me blushing
But I tried to keep my cool

My Heart skipped a beat
I saw you were glancing my way
I noticed that shy smile you had
Wanted to smile back
Instead,
I looked down to the ground
Again my shyness overcame my desires
And timidity has got the better of me

26/2/10

Like a Rainbow

60 Days

60 days since you went away
Since you left me in tears;
60 days,
That is how long I’ve missed you
Thought about you.

I never saw my love in you
And until the day you left
Never have I felt so empty.

Should have been there for you
Walked with you
Cried your tears
Stood by your side
With a heart full of regrets
I kept thinking about the things I didn’t do.

Things have changed
The world moved on
The sun came out after the storm
A rainbow appeared after the rain
Yet,
Here I am
Still longing for you
Wishing things would have turned out differently.

I wish I could control the time stream
And turn back to the times
When you were smiling and laughing.

09.23PM, 8/11/09


60 days,
You never left my thoughts.

1440 hours,
Praying that you'll come back into our arms.

86400 minutes,
Believing in you, trusting you.

5184000 seconds,
Missing you.

I Let You Go

Why did I let you leave?
Only staring at your back
As you walked away with your head down
Your figure became vague
Less vivid
I let you walk away
I let you go

Here I am
By the window sill
With my heart resembling the rainy day
Missing your smile
Your laugh
Your voice
Even your silliness
Boy, I'm missing you

I kept listening to that song
Remember?
The beautiful song you sang to me?
But sorrow was all I felt
With every tear shed
I miss you even more

I know
I did let you go
But please come back
Just come back

1.59PM 27/09/09

~I wrote this because I'm missing Jay...

A Wonderful Weather

The sun is shining brightly today
I took a walk in the park
And sat on the bench staring into nothingness
A wonderful weather it is

It is sunny again today
I did gardening
I planted some roses
And daisies too
A wonderful weather it is

It is breezy today
I bought a kite and brought it to the park
Tried to make it fly
It wouldn't
In the end, I gave it to a kid
And enjoyed looking at him play with it
A wonderful weather it is

The sun came again today
Alone with a book and a picnic basket
I spent an afternoon in the garden
A wonderful weather it is

It is raining today
And I thought of you
Wondering if you would come back
Staring out through the window
I said to myself
"A wonderful weather it is today"
Because I get to think of you

7/8/09

Poetry Disaster

I wrote this piece yesterday. I saw this one drama and it prompted me to write something out of it. After I was done writing, I read it again for the second time. And I laugh at what I wrote. HAHAHAHA.... the first line made me laugh so hard. How did a toothbrush ended up in my poems??? hahahhaha!!!! Isn't it supposed to be a sad piece, but it brought laughter instead. I showed it to Naza. And he laughed too!! And he was right. This does not sound like a poem, it sounds more like a diary instead.

Just wanna share with you peeps this poetry tragedy of mine. hahaha...


I threw your toothbrush away
And kept your towel today
I need not have to rush using the bathroom
Nor need I have to prepare double breakfast
I was glad not having to share the morning papers

I had the busiest day today
And not even once I thought of you
I had dinner with girlfriends
I went shopping too
And I wasn't worried coming home late

But I came home to a dark house
The driveway was empty
Your car was no where to be seen
With no one to greet me in the doorway
No one to give me a hug
No one to tell me I did great today
No one to kiss me good night
And again tonight, I slept alone.

3/7/09

Trying hard to squeeze it out

Lately I've been trying to squeeze out some poems from my brain while being in a state of emotionless. Unfortunately, only 2 pieces came out. This clearly proves that I don't have a writer's block, because I don't think a normal writer's block last as long as mine.

I only managed to write 2 pieces within these 2 weeks. Which are : Wouldn't It Be Nice and Like A Rainbow (two of my recent blog post). I was emotionless though when I wrote those two.

The previous poems I wrote was during the times when I just broke up, I was lonely, I had a crisis, I was sad, or I felt overwhelm... I know, it is a bit weird that I can only write poems when I have an uneasy feeling or something is bothering me. I have to admit, I write better when I'm sad. I tried to write when I'm happy, it didn't work. The pieces were not good enough to be publish in my blog.

However so, now I'm trying really hard to extract every ounce of creativity I have left.
Owh, and to all readers. I finally read comments you guys wrote. Thanks for liking my poems. And I hope to provide more soon.

Just Like A Rainbow

Never can I touch you
Hold you
Kiss you
Feel your warmth on cold lonely nights
Never can I tell you my heart's secrets
Nor my desires
Not even my pain
Because loving you
Like a rainbow it is

Everything about you is just too beautiful
But I should have known better
I shouldn't have loved you
Knowing that I can never have you
Knowing that you are not meant for me
And all I can do is just gaze at you
Just like a rainbow
I can only gaze at you

28/7/09


* an inspiration from a Korean drama

Wouldn't It Be Nice

It came true
What you wished for came true
Once you had a wish
To never again let love in
Too much pain
A love that left
Or a one-sided love
Even a love you never notice 'til it was too late
Neither your soul nor heart can bear
Reminiscing tears never dries.

Wouldn't it be nice?
To love and be loved again
To be able to trust a stranger's heart
And believe you'll never be hurt
Wouldn't it be nice?
To bask in blissfulness
To have someone to cuddle when it gets cold
To share a piece of cake
To feel the tingle when your arm brushes against his
Wouldn't it be nice?
If you could open your heart again.

Deceived

Deceived,
Again I was
By all your lies
All those sweet words
And innocent touch
I liked the way you played with my hair
The way you fiddled with my fingers
It felt like I fit perfectly in your embrace
Or was it just my imagination?
A mere illusion
I couldn’t tell
Oh, how so confused I was
You were being very deceptive
Like as if you were playing tricks with my mind.

Your actions shout “I like you. I’m falling for you.”
But somehow I know
That was not how you truly felt
And I was just someone whom you’d picked to play around with
Why?
Why did you chose this lonely heart,
If all you intended to do was just hurt it?
Why did you chose me,
If all you intended to do was just to have fun?
Did I seem gullible in your eyes?
Am I credulous?
I wonder who am I to you.

You seemed to be like the best thing that had ever happened to me
But really,
You are just an absolute mistake
How I wish I could turn back the hands of time
And you and I,
We never have had happened.


20/4/08

My Significance

There were times when I thought that nobody cares,
I thought that I was all alone in this cold lonely world,
That my existence was insignificant,
That I was less human;
Thought that the world can function without me in it,
And nothing would alter if I vanish.

How wrong was I to think as such;
Somehow, somewhere,
There is a hand reaching to hold mine,
A friendly eye meeting mine,
A lovely smile to brighten my world;
Even the coldest of heart,
Had something to offer,
With just a glance towards my direction,
I knew I was part of something.

Only now I know,
I am important to someone,
Even just to a small degree,
I actually do meant to someone.

Freedom Out There

As I came closer towards the door,
My heart beats faster,
The rhythm of the African drums,
It played in my head,
I broke into cold sweat,
My legs wobbled,
Adrenalin rushing in my veins,
Is this what freedom means?
How it feels like?
The door was ajar,
I peeped through it,
I was amazed at first sight;
And through that door,
I saw the joy of life
How could I have forgotten how wonderful feels like?
I’m so eager to discover more beyond this door,
To learn how to live again,
To breathe again,
To bask in the beauty of life,
To be free, as an uncaged bird,
Soaring through the sky,
And through the rainbow;
At last, new hope is found.
Stepping out that door,
It almost felt like another dimension,
I left my ugly past at the door;
I closed it,
Locked it,
And throw away the key;
Never will it be open again.

Don't Wait

Never be afraid
To unveil what’s in your heart
To bare out your soul
Never have the fear
Of telling somebody that you love them
That they are the one;
Because love and chances
Only comes along once
You’d be lucky
To stumble upon them twice;
Always remember
Love does not linger around unattended
And you would be foolish
To expect love to wait
For it may fly away
To those who truly appreciate the beauty it upholds.

2.05am, 24/6/07

Diverging Road

Two hearts so different
They arrived at a point
A diverged road ahead
She had to let him go
Separated by a vast space
Wide distance
A future so vague.

He left a void in her heart
How could she ever fill it back again?
After all this time,
The love that is lost
The hope that is gone
Only time would tell.

Looking through the glass of memories
A blurred past
She had to loosen her grip
She had to let him go.

She had a dream today
They were back at the point
Where the road had diverged
But only to say her last bid
She kept that dream away
Only to let it be covered by the dust of time
Finally, she is letting him go.


21/06/07


This is one of my favorite. I was woken up by a dream and couldn't get back to sleep. So out came this piece.

Would You?

Would you be the one?
The one who I could always turn to
When life has turn its back on me
When I’m caught in the middle
Of fury and sorrow;
Without a word said
Would you come to comfort me?
When tears fills my eyes
When I ran away and hide
Would you come and hide with me?

If I’m drowning in my own tears
Help me save myself
And pull me out from that void
Be there for me
It’s all I’m asking for
Care a little for me
I’m not begging for more
Forever be my best friend
For I have no greater expectations.


I wrote this about a year plus ago before I flew to Moscow. Was in a pretty bad shape at that time, being alone. So yeah, I was sad, and out came this piece. Hehehe....

This Emptiness

I am neither deaf
Nor am I blind
But every time I close my eyes
Silence and darkness are my companions
Surrounded by nothing more
Then the sound of my own heart beat
This obscurity impaired me
Searching through this emptiness
Never to find an end
Not even a beginning.

If there is a path
It will lead to somewhere with an end
And definitely there was a beginning
But this emptiness
There is nothing
Only a meaningless existence.

Nothing to hold on to
Nothing to wait for
Nothing to hope
Emptiness
There is nothing.


I can't remember exactly when I wrote this one, but I think it was around a year ago. I wrote this one after watching a Japanese drama about a deaf girl who plays the piano. I was inspired by her and her friends. She was a great pianist until she slowly lost her ability to hear. Her disability broke her spirit. She stop playing. But then she tried again and again, with encouragement from her friends, until she could play again even with deaf ears.

Di Persimpangan Dua Impian

This is my 1st and only poem in Malay. I have never written any more in Malay, I don't know why. Maybe I should try to write more someday..

Percintaan
Umpama satu perjudian
Perjudian untuk mencari kebahagiaan
Sama-sama kita pertaruhkan
Hati dan perasaan
Tahu akan nikmat dikala menang
Juga sedar akan deritanya
Pabila diambang kekalahan

Melangkah bersama kita seiringan
Namun seringkali bertentangan
Mengapa kita dipertemukan
Dalam satu perselisihan

Hadirnya cinta
Di satu persimpangan
Yang memaksa kita
Membuat perhitungan
Inilah lumrah kehidupan
Titik mula
Ada kesudahan

Kita dua
Insan yang cukup berbeza
Punyai impian tak serupa
Di sana engkau mengejar cita
Di sini aku mencari bahagia

Di persimpangan itulah
Yang mengungkai ikatan dua hati
Yang membelah jalinan kasih
Yang mengurai segala janji
Namun mengukir seribu memori

30/05/06

Never, Never, Never....

This is the second poem that I wrote. I think it was much better then the 1st one. And this is one of my favorite.

Never make a promise
When you know you’ll break it
When you know you can’t keep it

Never say forever
If you don’t really meant it
If you don’t know the future
If you would leave

Never say love
If you think it’s just a word
If you think it’s for fun
If it’s just a game
Never say love
When you are not willing to die for it
When you don’t want to sacrifice

Never give hope
If it’s vague
If someday you’ll take it back
If someday you will have a change of heart

Never lock a heart
When you’ll throw away the key
And walk down the other road
When you have already chain its soul

When you do
You will break hearts
You will shatter dreams
It is selfish of you, because
You cannot remake promises
You cannot rebuild hopes and dreams
You cannot unlock the heart
You cannot unlove a person.

26/05/06

The First

I was just cleaning up my external hard disk. Deleting all the unwanted files. Then I stumbled upon a folder named 'New Folder', which means I didn't rename the folder before. To my surprise, the folder contains all the poems I had written long ago. I thought I had lost them along with my laptop. Oh yeah, I did lose my dear laptop at the airport...huhu...long story.. Anyway, I thought I didn't make any copies of the poems. But I actually did...I had actually forgotten about those poems coz' the last one I wrote was half a year ago..hahaha...

This is the first one I wrote. I remembered I was in a dazed when I wrote this one. It was after I broke up with someone. I was in a slump. Before I didn't know that I could write. But there's the thing, I could only create poems when I'm feeling sad or lonely. When I'm happy, no words as such comes into my mind. Weird? I know. I guess it's just a way my heart's trying to mend itself. So the first one is called : Like The Cycle Of Tides.
It wasn't great. But it was the start.

Rise and fall,
Like a wave,
The heart floats and sinks,
Abiding the nature,
The nature of the tides;
She sailed into the open ocean,
Went through harsh storms,
Almost sank ‘till the bottom once,
But great will kept her afloat again;
Until then,
She awaits for another heart,
To come and sweep hey away,
To save her from sinking again,
To sail into a peaceful ocean,
Together towards the sunset.

23/04/06

This was written more then 2 years ago. I was 18 years old. Reading it now, it somehow sounds funny.hahaha... Anyhow, I'm open to comments.